The Ultimate Love Test: Episode 6
Last Couple Standing:
The Search For America's Most Dysfunctional Couple
Recap By Caligirl
July 15, 2004
What have we learned so far? Nothing much. Four couples started out and two remain. Kenesha and Brandon broke up and rightfully so, while Jayre and Carolyn made headway in working things out.
Heather, though tempted by C.R. is unwilling to let go of that loser Frank because the band might hit it big one of these days. Maybe that's what their thing was all about. Everybody else was a stooge.
Amber, the more sophisticated artistic type might not go any further with Roy, but I have a feeling that she'll move to New York or LA.
I'm hazarding all these guesses because I will tell you what might have been a huge secret. This show has bored me to tears.
I cannot stand to hear the same stuff over and over again. ABC has stretched the show beyond its limitations, and I am not pleased. I just heard a horrible rumor that there might even be another episode. If that's the case, then I'm going to check into the spa in Ojai and not be heard from again. I would venture to say that even "For Love or Money" had more interesting people and they cut it down to 5 episodes in a smart move.
Heather, Frank and C.R.
The couples return to Los Angeles. With that occurrence all thoughts and feelings come rushing back for Heather. Like when did they ever leave?
Meanwhile, Frank decides to go and work on some music with his fellow band member Jeremy. As indecisive as Frank is, he knows what he's doing when he has a guitar in his hand. He doesn't need Heather to do creative things. Jeremy's girlfriend Julia asks him what will happen to the band if he and Heather break up. As usual, you cannot get a straight answer out of Frank. He doesn't know what will happen. All he knows is that it might take him a while to recover. Maybe weeks, maybe months, maybe years.
Frank is busy cleaning up the apartment. He's vacuuming and saying that he wants Heather to trust him because he totally loves her. He even finishes putting together his chest of drawers and remarks to Milton (the cat, remember?) that it doesn't really match the rest of the furniture. Even Milton knows that it doesn't fit in.
The reason that Frank cleans up turns out to be simple. He's invited his friends over to blow off steam. Yeah, that's always a great reason to throw a bash for your buddies. His friend sets the mood with a tuneless, rhymeless song which incorporates the following, "Oh, Heather, I miss you so much. Come home, baby. Then I saw the videos. What shall I do? Where shall I go?" This is not only idiotic, but downright sadistic. They love to laugh at Heather and make Frank miserable. Some friends.
Heather is being pampered by C.R. as they both enjoy massages at a spa. She attests to the fact that she never gets to do "girly girl" things when she's hanging with the band, so this is a special treat. She says that she's trying to enjoy herself and not think too much because it's all so overwhelming. She's getting very anxious to be reunited with Frank, even though she and C.R. are hiking in beautiful Runyon Canyon off Mullholland Drive where you can "hike and do yoga high above Hollywood." That's so LA. Not unexpectedly, she is blabbing incessantly about Mr. Bushy Eyebrows. She needs to see Frank to resolve things and to see what lies ahead.
After the hike, C.R. takes Heather back to his apartment which she has been to before but definitely appreciates the changes that he has made. Gee, last time she was here she hadn't even met Cranky Frank yet. C.R. then brings out some old slightly naughty pictures of Heather which indicate that their relationship had reached a somewhat intimate level. Heather is beginning to feel awkward, whether it's from seeing her old photos or knowing that Frank is nearby. She is distancing herself from C.R. by telling him that they're in completely different places once again. She apologizes, but C.R. says that it's okey dokey because she's got a boyfriend and she took this test. Therefore she needn't apologize. What I want to know is, who put C.R. up to this, and how did they find him? Will those questions ever be answered? He gives it one more shot as he declares his love for her, but she's already gone back to Frank, the way I'm seeing it. She can always fall back on C.R. if things don't work out, because she knows he'll propose immediately.