Survivor Redemption Island: Russell Hantz - Stimpy's Take, Bio, Photo, Video And More
By Reality TV Calendar Senior Staff Writer Stimpy
January 19, 2011
Russell Hantz
Stimpy's Take:
I’m seriously thinking of renaming him ‘cockroach’ ‘cause this fucker just won’t go away.
In truth, I’m surprised he’d be willing to come back to a game he considers ‘flawed’.
And, why is it flawed? Because The Dick™ didn’t win either of his seasons, despite his own assertions that he was the best damn player both times.
Let’s be clear here: Russell the Dick™ ain’t winning this season either. Hell, even in one of the promo articles, Probst himself said The Dick™ ain’t winning.
And he never will, because he STILL doesn’t get the very important fact, that Survivor, at it’s core, is a social game.
Yes, strategy and back-stabbing do come into play, but if yer, well - a dick - in all things you do with other people, you ain’t winning.
And, it doesn’t even matter if Russell the Dick™ has figured that out (he hasn’t) and comes off as the nicest, most decent person to ever play the game of Survivor this season.
‘Cause now, he’s battling a ‘reputation’.
No one in Samoa had any idea what they were dealing with. Hell, even during Heroes vs. Villains, people didn’t even know who he was because they hadn’t seen his season when they were out there filming.
Everyone this season knows who the fuck Russell the Dick™ is now.
And that ain’t gonna help him.
Just looking at some of the cast bios and quotes, more than a few of them show a great deal of disdain for the man.
No matter how he tries to come off, people are gonna be wary of him, and they may (should?) gang up on him, fast and quick to get him outta their hair.
Of course, the lame twist could lead to The Dick™ (The Cockroach™?) coming back to haunt these poor people, not unlike he’s been doing to Survivor viewers these past few seasons.
That being said, as much as I hate to admit it, be prepared for another LONG, LONG, LOOOOOOOOOOOOONG season of Russell the Dick™ on your screens dear readers.
No matter what I think of the guy, I can guaran-fucking-tee you this much: You put me out there, and plop this asshole on my tribe I’m immediately thinking:
FINALS GOLD BAYYYYYYBEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!
You just saddle up and ride that arrogant prick all the way to the million.
Unless of course you run into a jury like Heroes vs. Villains one that chose to punish Parvati for being too tight with him, even though that was her only option, because everyone else seemed to want her gone.
And, not unlike Rob, Russell the Dick™ has the opportunity to display a little acumen right outta the gate.
Even if everyone is stacked against him from the get-go, if (and that’s a BIG IF) The Dick™ is smart, he figures out who’s in the power alliance, and then approaches who’s not, and gets them to realize working with him is in their best interests.
Dunno if The Dick™ has it in him to be that adept, especially with his reputation dogging him at every turn.
I seriously doubt The Dick™ has really learned anything. Let’s face it, if he considers the game flawed because he doesn’t win, they he really can’t have learned a damn thing.
One of the keys of this game is the ability to adapt.
But that doesn’t seem to apply to our resident bull in a china shop.
So, all his bullshit with people - coupled with his reputation, probably won’t fly.
Any attempt to form another ‘dumb girls alliance’ - coupled with his reputation, probably won’t fly.
Trying to be in control all the time, because NOT being in control doesn’t sit well with his alpha-male mindset - coupled with his reputation, probably won’t fly.
The Dick™ won’t win. But he’s likely in there for awhile, because at least ONE person out there has to know how good he’d be in the finals. Unless of course, that shit that befell Parvati scares anyone off.
Then, The Dick™ could be fucked.
But, since I don’t have that kinda luck, expect him to be around for awhile.
Bio: Russell Hantz (38) Current Residence: Dayton, Texas Previous Seasons: "Survivor: Samoa" and "Survivor: Heroes vs. Villains"
Russell Hantz was a first time castaway only 2 years ago, but has quickly become one of the most notorious villains to every play Survivor. He returns to SURVIVOR: REDEMPTION ISLAND more prepared than ever before. "I'm ready for this. I'm more ready for this than I ever have been."
As a self-made millionaire who built his business by working hard, speaking his mind and stepping on anyone who got in his way, Russell will do anything to win the game of Survivor. He is known for back-stabbing his allies, lying and cheating, but he is proud of his title as a villain. "The image that I have as a villain, that's fine with me because this is how I play the game." Only time will tell if this strategy will pay off or if once again he will come up short.
What does he think of SURVIVOR: REDEMPTION ISLAND? "It's gonna be history. Survivor history!
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